Forgiveness truly is a gift you give yourself.
Forgiveness does not say the behaviour or situation was ok, it simply says, I am no longer willing to carry this around with me, I release this person or event so my past doesn’t continue to affect my present and my future.
I did say it was simple, not necessarily easy and sometimes there are layers. It may feel like the same issue shows itself again at another time in your life or something triggers you to remind you of that person or event and you may find some residue is still there. I take that to be just another opportunity to release, to forgive again. Life’s a journey of improvement not a pursuit of perfection.
The goal for me is to be happy, to feel good and to have some mastery over my life, to be more at cause and less at the effect of outside circumstances.
Forgiveness is a step to mastering my life. If I hold unforgiveness I am allowing something outside of myself to have power over me.
Forgiveness is a decision – you choose to forgive – to let go and choose to stop allowing it to have power over you, this is Alchemy – true transformation.
Here is a formula that I have found useful, it was shared with me through a Personal Development program Shane Krider wrote and one that I use to guide my own Personal Development.
Write out an ” I am responsible Statement”. When you come up against a person or situation that is affecting you in negative way, one that continues to allow drama in your life or one that just keeps circling around in your thoughts.
Write out where you are responsible. The part you played in this situation – remember this is private, for your eyes only and being honest with yourself is a must to have any kind of mastery over your life. Once you acknowledge your part it usually shifts the energy and the space is created for you to forgive the person ( not the actions).
After you have written out your forgiveness to them, it’s time to forgive yourself.
I found I am a pretty forgiving person, of other people, I was way tougher on myself. Forgive yourself, learn the lesson so you can choose differently in the future but let it go.
Breath out, give yourself a hug and see what new, more positive things show up.
As always, Abundant Bleessings.